Day 54: What's with this weather?!

Thursday, December 21st

I can't believe the weather we're having this year. First a huge flood in November, followed by the crazy snow, and now massive windstorms? Maybe this is just like The Day After Tomorrow.

Last week was pretty nuts. We went down for the Seahawks game on Thursday, the night that they predicted the storm to hit. We hit the bar before the game at about 2 and when we left at about 5, there was a torrential downpour. Within just a couple of seconds of standing outside, all of us were soaked to the bone. Clint, Jesse, and I ran through an alley to get to the stadium, and the gutters were just pouring off water. It didn't matter too much though because we were pretty much as wet as we could get. We sat through the entire (horrible) 3 hour game miserably cold. It could've been worse, though. If I hadn't had so much to drink beforehand I would've cared a whole lot more.

After we got back from the game was when the big storm hit. I couldn't believe how hard the wind was blowing, it was NUTS. Clint's parents lost power Thursday night and didn't get it back until Friday afternoon. My parents lost it Thursday and didn't get it back until early Sunday morning. Fortunately, they have a generator, so we got to watch TV and have heat.

I guess there are still lots of people without power and I feel so bad for them. It amazes me, though, that people are bringing charcoal barbeques and generators into their houses to heat them up. It's so sad how many people have died of carbon monoxide poisoning because of it!

Early this morning we had a fantastic thunder and lightening storm complete with hail. I brought Colby to bed with us and when the lightening hit the first couple of times he said, "Wooooah." It was pretty cute.

But it looks like we have a break in the weather today. I think they said there should be more windstorms in the near future, though. Oh boy!

Okey dokey, I'm going to hop in the shower now, while the little man is sleeping. I hope everyone has a fantastic Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Day 53: Another Day.

Wednesday, December 6th

Ahh, life. It's amazing, frustrating, and wonderful all at the same time. Kinda like being a parent. It's just one big roller-coaster of ups and downs and all you can do is keep your hands inside the ride and hold on.

I've been in kind of a melancholy mood lately and can't really put my finger on it, but I'm going to try.

I'm kinda sad that I haven't gotten into the Christmas spirit yet this year. I'm a major Christmas person and usually blast Christmas music the second Thanksgiving is over (and lots of times before it's over), but this year I haven't. We haven't decorated yet and I think that has a lot to do with it. Hopefully after we get our tree up and decorated on Saturday I'll be more cheery.

I also miss my friends. Don't get me wrong, I love chatting with my online buddies, but nothing quite substitutes a good face-to-face chat with a girlfriend. I need that so badly. I feel a little pathetic.

The other thing that I think has gotten me down is probably kind of a shock to most people, because it was a shock to me. I am sad that this next Thursday game is my last Seahawks game of the season. As of right now I don't know if I'll be able to get tickets next season, or if that's even an option for me. I have enjoyed going to the games SO much, have learned a ton about football, and really like hanging out on a Sunday morning drinking and walking around the tailgate area. It's so much fun hanging out with Clint and his friends, although I hope I haven't crashed their "guy time." It just makes me sad to know that my fun Seahawks season is almost over. :o(

Yep, I think that sums up pretty well why I'm such a party pooper. At least now I know.

This weekend was totally awesome, though! I took Clint on a surprise trip for his birthday and we had a lot of fun. We stayed the night in a motel on Friday night and early Saturday boarded the Victoria Clipper. We spent the weekend walking around Victoria, talking, hanging out in the hotel, basically just relaxing. It was weird to have no baby responsibilities. There were a couple of times that I was like, "Hmmm, no baby to entertain us, what should we do?" That dilemma was solved quickly though, don't worry. On Saturday night we were once again walking around, looking for that nummy toffee that I can only find in Canada, when all of these cops came by with their sirens going. We thought there was an accident or something, but soon after a whole parade of semis, dump trucks, and other big rigs came up the road. They were each decked out in Christmas lights and those big blow-up snow globes and some were pumping Christmas music from huge speakers. It was such a riot!

It was so nice to get away for the weekend with my man. I think we really need to make time for eachother because it's so easy to get caught up in the daily grind of life and being parents that we forget the reason we're together in the first place. I don't want our kids to grow up and move out and Clint and I look at eachother like, "Who are you again?"

Alrighty, I'm behind on my Christmas present knitting, so I'd better go. Hope everyone is doing well!!

Day 52: Adventures in Snowland.

Wednesday, November 29th

I have had just about enough of this adventure. After a wonderful, relaxing holiday weekend we were supposed to come home on Tuesday with no problems right?

Wrong.

It all started Monday after the Seahawks game. We left the parking garage at 9:30 and immediately hit traffic on I-5. The freeway was one huge ice rink, cars stopped on the side of the road, and some abandoned in the road. It took us about an hour to go from the south end of Northgate Mall to the north end. Yeah, that's less than a mile. We were stuck behind a bus and next to a semi, and were inundated with the smell of exhaust the whole time. Around the north end of Northgate the semis started spinning their tires. We were in Jesse's Durango (thank God), and he was able to squeak through 4 semis just sitting in the road.

After navigating that mess, we had "clear" roads ahead, but we still had to drive at a snail's pace because of the ice. Pretty soon after the Northgate mess we came up on a jack-knifed articulated bus and broken down semi which Jesse had to squeeze between. The freeway was a mess! We saw a bus backward up an incline, and more broken down cars and semis than I could count. Apparently the other freeways and highways were even worse though, because the news stations didn't really mention I-5.

We came up on more brakelights in Edmonds and decided to get off the road and look for a hotel. Fortunately Hwy 99 was pretty much free and clear and we decided to just push on through. We got in the door at 1:15 am, almost 4 hours after leaving Seattle. From what I hear, we were lucky, though. It took some people 6 or more hours for similar distances.

Tuesday we decided to make the trip back home. It was sunny and nice, and although it was chilly we figured it'd be okay to come back. Our trip up was uneventful for the most part until we got into our town. I slipped a little on the off-ramp and another few times before we got home, but it didn't matter because we were about to be home in our warm apartment and our own beds.

Wrong again.

I walked in the door and realized that our power was out. Crap. I guess it had been out for a while because our fridge stunk and our milk was warm! We called Clint's sister and decided to crash with her for the night. This morning we finally braved our commute back home and I slipped on the ice a little more. Fortunately this time the power was on and we had a chance to buy groceries.

Now we're just enjoying our heater and waiting for the next snowstorm that will be arriving tonight!

I've had as much adventure as I can take for the rest of the year.

Oh, and PS- The game was freakin' awesome, but extremely cold. Like Clint said, this all would've been a lot worse if the Seahawks had lost!

Day 51: Wow, this isn't a dream.

Friday, November 3rd

Colby snuggled me today, which is a rare thing since he's such a busy kid. He laid his head on my chest and just sat there listening to my heartbeat. It's times like these that make my heart feel so full I'm pretty sure it's going to explode, and that would be okay. Day after day I wonder if this life I am leading is a dream. Did I really marry the most wonderful guy on Earth 3 years ago? Did I give birth to my beautiful son 13 months ago? Do I actually get to watch him grow up forever and ever? Do I really live this completely blessed life? Am I that lucky?

I can't believe that Colby is here forever. He's mine! I get to experience all of the wonderful-ness and not-so-wonderful-ness of being a parent to this amazing child. Every day I look at him and have to pinch myself because I can't believe he's real. I can't believe my life is real. It's too awesome to be real. Wow.

I love the little things Colby does to make me happy. I will never forget when Colby was 4 days old. We were having difficulty breastfeeding and he was screaming because he was so hungry. As I held this screaming baby I lost control and just broke down into tears. He suddenly stopped crying and watched me with the sweetest look on his face as if to say, "Mama, what's wrong?" It was in that moment that I felt like I was the most important person in his life and he needed me.

There have been other times that I have been having a bad day and he'll give me a kiss, or want to snuggle me, and it makes me feel so special. I don't care if he doesn't want to say "Mama" as long as I get those little moments where he shows me he loves me.

I can't wait to have another baby, for this love to grow exponentially. I know that Colby is going to be the best big brother and I'm excited to see him take care of his little brothers/sisters.

I love that I have so much to look forward to in life. We're going to buy a house, have more babies, get a dog, travel... I pray to God that my life isn't over until I have done everything in this life that I want to do. I pray that I get to grow old with Clint and that we can watch our children grow up and have their own children, and maybe we could even live long enough to hold our children's children. I want to be that cute old couple that walks hand-in-hand down the street. God willing, we will.

I hope everyone has a safe, fun weekend. Thanks for listening to my sappiness.

Day 50: Long time gone.

Thursday, November 2nd

Man, I haven't written in a while! I have been pretty busy and wasn't even home all last week, so that's why. I guess I'll start at the beginning!

A week ago Sunday I went to the Seahawks game and watched them lose and watched Hasselbeck get injured. Bummer. After the game I met my mom and Colby down the street from Qwest Field and we drove down to Portland where my mom had to go for some conference for work. We stayed at the Embassy Suites and had a really relaxing fun time. Colby loved running around the hotel and thought the glass elevators were awesome. I got a hold of one of the moms I met on BabyCenter and we met up at the mall. It is always SO cool to meet people that I have talked to for so long online. I love it.

Tuesday we drove home and stopped in SeaTac where Clint was staying for a training thing for work. We were trying to surprise him and the front desk even gave me a key to his room, but after waiting around for about an hour he didn't show up and we left. Turns out, he went out to dinner with the guys. Oh well.

Thursday I left Colby with my parents and stayed at the hotel with Clint. We went out for dinner with some of his coworkers and then had some drinks alone in the hotel bar. We were pretty pathetic, though because we were both so tired we had crashed by about 9:30pm. What do ya do?

Colby dressed up as a dragon for Halloween and we trick-or-treated first at Clint's work, and later at the mall. We got so many complements on his costume, which my mom found for $10 at Value Village! Colby had so much fun carrying his little bucket around and getting candy. He got his first taste of chocolate that day and LOVED it.

Wednesday morning Colby had his surgery to unplug his tear ducts. So far, it seems to have gone well. He's back to normal after being knocked out, but he still has some eye gunk in his left eye. The doctor said to watch it and it will probably go away, but if it doesn't she'll give us an eye ointment for nighttimes. If that doesn't work, she may have to go back in and put a stint in the tear duct, but we're hoping that doesn't have to happen. I'm so relieved that the surgery is over and done with. I can't wait for people to stop asking me if my son has been crying all day or if he has an eye infection. My poor kid is so sick of us picking at his eyes, so I'm sure he'll be glad to have them fixed too.

Today we're just hanging out. The weather is pretty icky so I think we'll stay inside. I have plenty of cleaning I could be doing anyway.

So, we got a little excited about a house on some land this past weekend. My dad told us about this manufactured home on 4.23 acres just up the street from them for only $155K! We were hoping to have a chance at getting it, since that's well within our price range, but there are a bunch of red flags with it and we aren't going to pursue it. Clint's friend Chris is a real estate agent and hooked us up with a ton of listings of houses around our price range, and there are a couple that look interesting. They're fixer-uppers, but we know that's pretty much what we're going to have to settle for since we're only living off of Clint's income. I think we're going to wait until Spring to really look at homes, though. Even if Clint does get a transfer, he won't be able to do that until after tax season, so there's no point in us trying to move before then. And, if he can't transfer it'd be a bad situation for him to have to commute all that way every day. Definitely not fun for him.

I'm so excited thinking about getting a house. I can't wait to have some semblance of a yard where I can go out on the back porch and watch Colby play in the dirt and grass. I can't wait to be able to paint and decorate and have pictures and things on my walls. I can't wait to be able to turn the TV up to a normal volume without worrying that my neighbors are going to be bothered. I can't wait to not be able to hear my neighbors getting it on. (Did I mention they're probably in their 70s?)

Ugh, I absolutely cannot wait.

I have decided to challenge myself. I want to read 10 books before December 31st, and I have already finished 5 books!

1. Milkrun by Sarah Mlynowski (Funny!)
2. The DaVinci Code by Dan Brown (Page-turner.)
3. Welcome to My Planet by Shannon Olson (Not my favorite, but okay.)
4. Children of God Go Bowling by Shannon Olson (Much better than the first.)
5. The Virgin Suicides by Jeffery Eugenides (Creepy, interesting, intriguing. I'm still not sure if I loved it, but I definitely didn't hate it.)

And I'm working on 2!

1. Angels and Demons by Dan Brown
2. Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs

Man, I love reading.

Anyway, I'd better get to that cleaning. Oh, and I have fallen off the horse as far as exercising goes, so I'm really going to try and get back into that. Wish me luck!

Day 49: Awesome weekend.

Monday, October 16th

I could not have asked for a better weekend! I love when we go south for the weekend because we get to see our friends and family, but it is SO nice to just stay home every once and a while. On Saturday morning we woke up and Clint went to donate plasma for the first time. Despite my telling him it isn't that big of a deal, he wasn't looking forward to it. Turns out, everything that could go wrong, did go wrong with him and he was gone for 4 hours, when it only should've taken 2. Poor guy. I don't think he'll be wanting to donate again. Oh well, at least he gave it a shot.

After lunch, we all headed to the pumpkin patch. It was great! I don't remember the last time I went to a pumpkin patch, and it was so much fun to see the little kids enjoying themselves, smell the apple cider brewing, and feeling the fall air. Colby had a blast, which made it even more enjoyable. We ran into a guy from Clint's work and his family, as well as our doctor and his family. It kinda made me feel like we actually know people up here!

After the pumpkin patch, we went home and I made my extremely tasty chicken noodle soup. (The secret ingredient is ginger. Shhh!) Actually it isn't my recipe, since I found it online, but I'm taking credit for it anyway, so there. We capped off our wonderful day with hot soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. The perfect fall meal.

Clint and I finished The DaVinci Code on Saturday night, and we were pleased. It was really good, and it didn't leave us hanging at all! I went out and bought Angels and Demons on Sunday, and we read a little bit of that last night.

Yesterday was one of those good 'ol lazy Sundays. I made eggs, sausage, and hash browns for breakfast, and we spent most of the day doing laundry and dishes, and watching football (of course). The Seahawks game was the highlight of the day, although things started looking bleak in the 1st half. But, the Seahawks owe their turnaround to the fact that at halftime Clint put on his lucky brown sweatshirt. After that, they started doing awesome! I think they should make his sweatshirt an honerary lucky charm. :o)

Today is pretty laid back. I have a couple of errands to run, and I'm going to try to donate some plasma too. I don't remember if I wrote about this before, but I'm not going to be taking Colby to the daycare anymore, which means I have to wait until Clint gets home from work before I can go. I thought the lady watching Colby in the daycare was nice, but I don't think she can pay close enough attention because there can be up to 6 kids in the room at a time and she keeps the door open. So, to ease my worry, I just won't take Colby in with me.

Excuse me for a second while I get mushy.

My life is so wonderful right now. I know that there will be times in the future where things are rough or sad and I hope that during those times I can remember how happy I am right now. I hope I can always come back around to being this happy. I have a wonderful husband who is compassionate, loving, and unselfish. I have a beautiful son who is so happy, curious, and funny I often find myself just staring at him in awe that Clint and I created him (with a little help from The Man Upstairs, of course). How much better could it get?

I think the only part of my life that I'm not happy with right now is the whole friends situation. I have so many people down south that are my friends, who I love hanging out with and talking to. But because I'm not living near them, I can't be as good of friends as I'd like to be. I can't just call any of them up and say, "Hey, I'm bored, wanna take the kids and go for a walk?" or "Hey, I have some money burning a whole in my pocket, wanna go to the mall?" I have to schedule in advance what I want to do with them, because I'm only in town for a couple of days. Boo. At least I have friends that I can make plans with though, right?! That is definitely a good thing.

I think I would go crazy, and would drive Clint crazy if he was the only person I ever hung out with. A girl needs some other girls in her life. Sure, Clint will talk to me about girly things, but he doesn't quite grasp the concept of what I mean when I say, "Man, I have some killer cramps right now, and I think I gained 10 lbs overnight." Not that I expect him to, he's a guy after all.

Anyway, all that aside, I am very happy. It's fall, the leaves are changing, and the weather is getting cooler. I get to break out my cute warm clothes that I didn't get to wear last year because I was too fat after having Colby. I am going to get back on track exercising because I have really slacked off. I refuse to buy pants a size bigger than what I'm wearing now!

Hope everyone has a wonderful week.

Day 48: Feeling Fat.

Friday, October 13th
(Muahahahaha)

Okay, before I get on with my blabbering, I have to ask myself a question. Why the heck am I still numbering my entries? I started numbering because it was Day 1 of my workout and eating healthy. Now, it's just Day 48 of random crap. I toyed with using Entry 48, Log 48, Journal 48, but nothing quite has the ring that "Day" does, so I'm going to stick with it.

So back to the topic at hand. I feel like a COW today! Of course, that could have something to do with the fact that my parents took us out to dinner where I ate mozzarella sticks, jalapeno poppers, steak, chips, and a nummy chocolate cake with ice cream. Yeah, that'll do it. I'm going to try my darndest to get on the eliptical machine tonight. Maybe I'll do that before Colby goes to bed and give Clint and Colby some play time together.

This morning was so cool. Colby woke up at 6 crying, and I was in no shape to be awake yet, so I brought him to bed with us. It took him a little while to settle in, but he was soon fast asleep between Clint and I. Turns out my child is a bed hog, but it was so sweet to have my little family all sleeping together.

Anyway, I'm sure I was going to write about more but I got side-tracked and don't remember what I was going to say. Oh well, I'm sure I'll remember eventually. I just slammed my finger in a door, so I'm going to stop typing as the throbbing is starting to really hurt. (I'm a total clutz, in case you don't already know that.)

Have a good weekend!

Day 47: Playing catch-up.

Wednesday, October 11th

Woops, guess I have kinda slacked on writing, huh? My bad. I have been busy, I guess! It's amazing how little time I have for myself now that Colby is running around everywhere, and slowly but surely cutting back to one short nap a day. Noooooooo!

Another reason I haven't made time for journaling is because I have gotten back into reading for pleasure. It's amazing how college will suck the joy of reading out of you. It has taken me 2 years, but I'm back! My goal is to read 10 books before the end of the year. So far I have finished Milkrun by Sarah Mlynowski (very funny) and Clint and I are currently in the middle of The DaVinci Code by Dan Brown. We're going to read Angels and Demons next, but I need suggestions as to what book I should read on my own. Anyone have any good ideas?

Today has been pretty fun! After Colby's nap, we had some lunch and headed off the the University. Because I'm cheap and don't want to pay by the hour for parking, we took the shuttle. This was his first bus ride, and he thought it was so much fun. He stood on the seat (I kept a hand on him, don't worry) and looked out the window. He waved at passing cars and would occasionally say "Oooooh!" At the school we met up with Aunt Katie between her classes. Then, he got to run around everywhere. We got so many looks! (Good ones.) I suppose college kids don't share the courtyard with a one year old very frequently! Running around everywhere totally wore him out, so he's down for another nap right now. (Yesssss!)

So, here's another one of my crazy ideas. Maybe I could write a book. I don't have any background in how to do this, but it can't be that hard. Or maybe it is. Whatever. Anyway, I have journals from kindergarten with stories of things that have happened to me. Kindergarten! That's like 19 years of stories. Maybe I could write a coming of age story. Hmmm... It's a thought. The question is, who would want to read it? I mean, me of course, but that won't make much of a profit. My mom probably would too, because she's my mom and she's supposed to. And Grandma. Sweet! I already sold 3 copies of my yet-to-be-written book! Go me.

The last time I wrote, I mentioned that I was going to donate plasma. Turns out, it is the coolest thing ever. I go in, bring Colby to the daycare where he gets lots of attention and gets to play with TONS of toys. Then, they do some routine check of my blood and what-not, and send me back for an hour to get the plasma drawn. During this time, I get to sit and read. They pay me to sit and read, while my child is being watched by the nicest lady in the daycare. For free! Then, they hand over the cash. I make $15 the first time in a week, and $30 the second time. AND starting on October 16th, they're going to give $20 for the first donation instead of $15. That's $50 a week which adds up to $200 a month! I love getting paid to do nothing. I mean, I love getting paid to help people. Really, that is a cool thing about it.

Okay, the little monster has awoken. Gotta break out the graham crackers for our afternoon snack. Hope everyone is doing well!

Day 46: Sleep is good.

Wednesday, September 27th

Today has been such a wonderful day! Colby has been sleeping like a champ which means that for the first time in over a year, I have gotten a full nights' sleep on a regular basis. This morning I even woke up before him and got a shower in, just like normal people do!

We both got a nap this morning and after lunch we went to the park. Colby had a blast playing around on the equipment and surprised me by going down the little slide all on his own! He would climb up to it, sit down, push off, and get off the slide like a big kid. I was so amazed and really freaked out at first. We met some kids there and I got a chance to talk to another mom. She told me of some good places to take Colby, so that was nice!

This mom and I got on the topic of our city. She was telling me how much she loves it here and how beautiful it is, and I absolutely 100% agree with her. When I told her that our families live only about an hour away, she said, "Oh, that's not so bad!" Which really got me thinking. No, it really isn't so bad. I mean, so many people live thousands of miles from their families and here I am complaining about living an hour away?! It almost seems silly.

Really, I think that the reason why I want to move so bad is because right now we are in this state of limbo. We're in an apartment which is obviously a temporary living place. I hate temporary. Maybe if we had a house up here I wouldn't be itching to move so bad. But then again maybe I would! My problem right now is that I think we will be moving in the next year or less and I don't want to make really good friends with anyone up here because I know we're only here temporarily. This makes me more lonely in the short run, but saves me from losing friends in the long run, ya know what I mean? Plus, if I do become really good friends with someone up here and we do move, then I'll want to continue to see that friend and end up driving up here all over again. It totally defeats the purpose!

Okay, so I'm over-thinking things. Oh well. It's not like I'm sheltering myself from meeting people. We will be attending MOPS this year and there are lots of moms there to make friends with, and I love talking to other moms at the playground. I guess whatever happens, happens, right?

I just scheduled an appointment to donate plasma! I'm excited and a little bit nervous. I know it's a lot more involved and painful than donating blood, but I know that it helps people out. Alright, so that isn't the first reason why I'm doing it. I get paid $15 for the first donation of the week and $30 for the second. So it's a win-win situation! I help other people out, and I help us out too!

Alrighty, Colby's up from his nap and I should start thinking about dinner. I can't believe this week is half over!

Day 45: What a weekend!

Monday, September 25th

I am a little sad that the weekend is over! It was SUCH a blast. First off, Colby's party went off without a hitch. I was really worried that something would go wrong or that he wouldn't like his cake, silly stuff like that. Turns out I had absolutely nothing to worry about and it all went well! Everyone arrived around 1 and left by 4. My cousin Leslie and her family couldn't make it until 4, so we fired up the BBQ again and kept the party going! It was nice because I wasn't ready to stop partying. Plus, I hadn't really had a chance to eat the whole day because I was running around doing other stuff, so I got to have a burger!

Sunday was completely freakin' awesome. My dad had some work he had to do, so I got to take his ticket to the Seahawks/Giants game. It was off the hook! Because of all of the press about artificial noise being pumped through the speakers at Qwest field the crowd retaliated with some serious cheering and jeering. Clint is really hoarse today, and I have a sore throat. It was totally worth it, though!

Before the game Mike, Clint, Jesse and I hit the tailgate area early. I mean, we were drinking by 10am. I have NEVER drank that early! I ran into a couple of the bartenders from my former restaurant which was nice. They hooked us up with our first beers of the morning!

Anyway, the game was a total riot. I wish I could go to more, but I'm happy with getting tickets when people want to give them up. Mike's giving me his ticket to one of the Monday night games too! I'm so excited!

So, now my little man is one. I am so excited to watch him grow up! I am excited to have my body back for at least another year or two. To tell you the truth, I can kinda see why people only have one baby. I mean, you give your body up for 9 or 10 months. Then you go through the hell of labor and delivery along with recovering from it. Followed by another year or so of very little sleep, breastfeeding, and depression over the fact that your body will never be the same again. Don't get me wrong, it is completely 100% worth it, but it does suck at times. I am excited to do it all over again, just not yet.

I got another wind of really wanting to live down south this weekend. It was so nice seeing all of our friends and family. It makes me sad! When I'm up here, I feel like I don't have any friends, but down there I have SO many fun people to hang out with and many of them have babies around Colby's age. I told Clint we should just move before he gets a transfer and he can commute to and from work every day. I mean, he'd be going against traffic, so that'd be a plus! But still, it'd be over an hour of driving and that's not fair to him, especially during tax season.

Every time I wish we lived down south again, I remind myself that it will suck at first. We're planning on moving into my parent's studio apartment for a couple of months, and that is going to be very interesting with a 1 year old. I have no idea where we're going to put his crib, and when he goes to sleep, we're going to have to sleep too! Unless we stick him in the bathroom and shut the door... I'm only kidding. Kinda.

Anyway, I'm going to get going. I'm still pretty tired from the weekend, and new shows are premiering tonight! Sweeeet. Fall is so awesome.

Hope everyone has a great week! Go HAWKS!

Day 44: Emotional Wreck

Thursday, September 21st

Alright, so maybe the term "emotional wreck" is slightly over-dramatic, but I am emotional none-the-less. I can't believe my baby is going to be 1 in a little more than 24 hours! *Sniff!* It makes me sad that a year ago I had a little bundle that I cuddled and snuggled and that little bundle is now a big boy. Don't get me wrong, I am absolutely stoked to watch him grow up. Being a mom is by far the most exciting, wonderful, amazing experience, but it is also completely exhuasting and sometimes sad. I love every day that I wake up and get to watch Colby discover the world.

I went to order his cake today and as I pulled out of the parking lot I shed a tear. Later I tortured myself by watching A Baby Story and seeing a baby born. That was me just a year ago! Time flies so fast. Then, just now, I pulled his smash cake out of the oven and it got me all choked up. That's my little boy's first cake! (Okay, second since he had a bite of cake at Sage's birthday party.) My little boy who is growing up before my eyes. The little boy who now asks "What's that?" constantly (although it sounds more like "Uh dat?"). The little boy who is more interested in tupperware and playing in the dirt than snuggling with his mom. The little boy who no longer breastfeeds and wouldn't have time for it anyway. (Things to do, people to see, you know.) The little boy who is now a bona-fide toddler and will soon take the title of big boy.

*Sigh.*

I think that right now I am mourning the baby I once held because he isn't quite a year old yet. I think that once Saturday is over and done I will be over this emotional hump and looking forward to the toddler years. (Ha!)

So, in tribute to Colby's first birthday, I thought I'd post my birth story. There is a much, much longer version of this, but I figured it would be pretty boring for most audiences, so this is the summary.

Colby was due on 9/13, our 2nd anniversary. That day came and went with no sign of Colby, but a raging case of PUPPPs for me! On 9/20 I went to the doc and he scheduled me to be induced that night, as I was HUGE and extremely uncomfortable from the itching. They admitted me at about 7pm and started me on Cervidyl. I had a few contractions, but nothing progressed. The next morning they gave me Cytotec because the Cervidyl didn't work. At about 5pm I still wasn't in labor, and they sent me home. I kept a strong face, but I was absolutely crushed. Our nurse gave me a big hug and assured me that she thought I'd be in labor before my next scheduled induciton on 9/26.

The next morning I was still experiencing contractons from the Cytotec, and they turned into real labor. I went back to the hospital at 3pm. Thank goodness the nurse who had discharged us the day before was still there, because at 2cm I probably shouldn't have been admitted. I think she felt bad for me! I also got an epidural within 15 mins of arriving. WOHOO! I labored through the night and early in the morning the epidural started wearing off on my right side and I started throwing up.

At 6am I started pushing. Colby wasn't coming down like he should and I could feel his head pushing against the right side of my pubic bone. Ouch. The longer I pushed, the more I puked. They finally upped my epidural and gave me something to control the nausea. I remember asking Clint if I was going to die, he assured me I wasn't. I pushed for 3 hours and then was sent for a C-Section because of Colby's failure to decend.

At 10:42am on Friday, September 23rd Colby Tanner was born weighing in at a whopping 9lbs 5oz with a big 'ol head. No wonder he wouldn't come out!

Happy birthday my sweet little boy with the bluest eyes I've ever seen. I love you more than life itself and I am so excited to watch you grow and see the person you become. You are amazing.

Day 43: A new day.

Tusday, September 12th

All-in-all, yesterday was pretty good! Colby and I met Clint for lunch at Starbucks and then went to walk around the mall. At about 5pm my mom and brother showed up and we had pizza and Dairy Queen ice cream cake (my favorite) and just hung out. Clint brought home these really pretty orange flowers for me, along with a card that started with "To the woman I'd marry all over again." He melts my heart.

The only problem with yesterday was my mood. I watched TV in the morning about all of the 9/11 stuff and didn't turn it off until we met Clint for lunch. I knew I shouldn't, but I watched it and got sad. That stuck with me all day and I couldn't shake it. I was so down and depressed. That's how has been the last 5 years, though, so I guess I should just get used to it. I feel silly being so depressed on that day because I didn't know anyone involved in the attacks and I have never even been to NY, let alone the WTC. But, for some reason when I see those images it brings all of those horrible feelings back to me and I can't get rid of them. By yesterday evening, I found myself wishing the day was over already. How sad is that?

But, today is a new day. The weather is beautiful and I have so much to be thankful for. Today is going to be wonderful.

To Do:

1. Enjoy today

2. Laundry

3. Empty Dishwasher

Day 42: Proud to be an American.

Monday, September 11th

Today is the 5th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. I will never forget that day as long as I live. Here's an entry from my journal from the day after the tragedy. It was the first page in a brand new journal.

Dear journal,

Ya know, I really don't like to start things off on a sad note, but really, there's no way around it: my life, and the lives of every American has been changed.

I woke up earlier than normal yesterday for a couple of reasons. First, the sun was shining and I was getting really hot, and second, it was my 19th birthday. Needless to say, no onewill ever forget my 19th birthday, even if they didn't know I exist. I went downstairs and got on the internet to check on my bids on e-bay. My mom called to wish me happy birthday and asked if I had heard the news. Of course at this point, thoughts were racing through my head. "Who do I know that died??" Don't ask me why, maybe it was the tone of her voice, but I knew it invoved death-whatever happened. She told me to turn on the news, and it really didn't matter which channel, because all but 3 had the news. I watched in horror as a tape showed me over and over the planes crashing into New York's World Trade Center buildings and a portion of the Pentagon. I watched it over and over and never could I conceive the tradgedy that was unfolding. I was sad and angry, confused and felt hopeless. I wanted to help, but couldn't. I wanted to rescue people from that hell, but couldn't.

I had an extremely rough night last night. I listened to Delilah on 106.9 and her entire program was dedicated to mourning. She played the song Proud to Be An American and for the first time in this whole ordeal, I cried. I went to my parents house to have cake with my family and my mom wasn't doing too well. Her surgery didn't work and she's still in pain. She started crying and asked my dad to take her to her parent's house. I left then, it was all too much.

So, as is usually the case, I escaped to Clint's house. There, I cried because the effects of the day had began to sink in. Clint's mom handed me a birthday card; she had tears in her eyes. The card read, "Lindsay, you are such a special person and an important part of our family. We love you very much!" At that, the waterworks really started to flow and she gave me a hug and cried too.

With my dad and Corey at the land and my mom at my grandparent's house, and with all of the events of the day, I really didn't want to go home. Clint's parents let me stay the night and I was so grateful.

.. two days later I included this:

You can't get away from the news, the images and sounds on TV. You want to turn off the TV and forget about it, but there's this almost perverse attraction to the screen, the pictures of the ruble, people crying and showing pictures of relatives they have yet to find, not knowing if they're alive or not. Maybe you do snap out of the trance and change the channel, but it's only a matter of time before you find yourself back watching the news. It's not that you're entertained by the images, or enjoy seeing them at all, but there's this feeling of anticipation that something's going to happen. Maybe it'll be something good, like they find all 4,763 missing people alive and well, or even just one person. Then again, maybe something bad will happen, like more buildings collapse, or they call off the search for survivors. Either way, you end up watching.

-------------------------------------------------

So today is my 24th birthday. I always look forward to my birthday, but since that day, it has been bittersweet. I tell myself I'm not going to watch TV, but I always do. I tell myself I'm not going to cry, but I always do. Those images just make me so sad, and I know they always will.

We don't really have anything planned for the day. I'm going to get pizza for dinner: Garlic Chicken (my favorite). I think Clint's planning on taking me to dinner on Saturday night, so that will be nice. I'm super tired today because Colby didn't sleep well last night, so I'm just hoping for a nap and a shower. :o)

Hope everyone has a great week!

To do:

1. Enjoy birthday!

2. Nap.

3. Shower.

Day 41: September has arrived.

Tuesday, September 5th

Wow. It's already September, can you believe it?! Kids are going back to school and it feels like summer just started. Actually, I take that back, it has felt like a very long summer, but in a good way!

I am excited for the seasons to change. With every new season comes a new beginning. New weather, new opportunities, new... clothes! Okay, so maybe that's why I want it to get just a little bit colder outside. My mom took me shopping last weekend and got me an incredibly cute outfit. (Another early birthday present!) It's awesome because the outfit I got from Jenny is casual and the outfit from my mom can be casual or slightly dressy. I'm all set for warmer weather!

This week is going to be fantastic. Friday I get to see Kristen, who was my absolute best friend growing up. She lives in California and I haven't seen her since graduation in 2001. We are two totally different people, but that's what's fun about getting together with her. Plus, her family was basically my second family growing up and I'll get to see them on Saturday at her brother's wedding reception. Fun times!

I was reading through my journal last night. This time last year I was extremely pregnant and praying to go into labor, but not on my birthday. I kept saying in my journal that I was bored and just hanging around home, sleeping and watching TV. I wrote that I knew I was going to miss those days of peace and quiet and boredom once Colby was born. What's funny is that I really don't miss it. I hate being bored! And anyway, I do get peace and quiet when Colby goes down for naps. I would be miserable if I was at home with nothing to do. Granted, I know that he'll start napping less and start being louder and even more active than now, so maybe in the near future I will want some peace and quiet, but right now I'm a-o-k! I love that my day is spent entertaining, and being entertained by, Colby. There's nothing better in this world than hearing that little boy laugh.

Colby breakthrough: he will sit and read books. Well, only two books right now. See, any time I usually try to sit with him and read, he gets fussy and wants to go play. But, our friend Sage gave him two Feel 'n Learn type books called That's not my bunny... and That's not my tractor... where on each page you see why that isn't the right thing because something is too soft, or scratchy, or rough... It's great!

Anyway, the little monster has just woken up from his nap, so I should feed him some lunch! Have a great week!

To Do:

1. Buy Stamps

2. Groceries

3. Walk

Day 40: Fall is in the air.

Wednesday, August 30th

Oooh, I love this time of year! I love watching the leaves change, and feeling the cool breeze that cuts through the hot days. I love being able to wear jeans and jackets again. I love back-to-school, even when I'm not going back to school! Is that weird?

Tomorrow night my mom, dad, and I are going to a pre-season pro football game! I'm so excited. I have never been to a pro game before and I think it'll be fun. Clint's mom is going to watch Colby, so he'll get to hang out and have fun with his grandparents. Then Friday is Clint's dad's birthday, and Saturday is our friend Sage's first birthday party! We'll be home on Sunday and still have another day to hang out, since it's Labor Day weekend. I'm really looking forward to it.

Every night, when I go to bed, I am so excited for the next day. I have never experienced this before, unless I'm going on a trip or have something fun planned. I just love waking up, playing with Colby, putting him down for naps, cleaning, cooking, blogging, and drinking coffee. It makes me feel good to have a clean (or at least semi-clean) apartment, and a happy kid and husband. I know that much of the reason for my happiness is that I have found a good balance. I don't neglect myself. I make sure that if I'm tired I take a nap (when Colby's napping, of course). If I need a break because Colby has been exceptionally cranky that day, I hand him off to Clint and have some time to myself. I make time for everyone.

I am so happy in my life right now, and I couldn't imagine it any different. We are working towards owning a house sometime (hopefully) soon. We have healthy dinners and still have extra money to have fun. Our families are awesome, and our friends rock. I am one lucky woman. I am glad for the choices I have made in my life. They haven't always been the easy ones, but they have definitely been the right ones. I'm so fortunate, thankful, and absolutely grateful for what I have. It scares me to know that everything could be taken away from me in an instant, but there's no use in worrying about something I have no control over. I will just take each day as it comes, and enjoy every minute.

Shew. Sometimes I get kinda deep and Dr. Phil-ish don't I? Well I'm done. (For now anyway!)

Today's weather is looking kind of bleak. Just a preview of what's to come in the fall and winter, I guess. It's a darn good thing I love the rain. I couldn't live anywhere that's sunny all the time. Sometimes you just need a break from the sunshine, ya know? Plus, I am a strong believer that we are more appreciative of the sunny days because we don't get them all the time.

I was going to walk to Costco to pick up the invitations I ordered, but we'll see how the weather holds up. It's amazing to me, last fall we took our newborn Colby for walks in his stroller and there were lots of fall leaves on the path. This year we'll still go for walks on the same path and there will be more leaves, but Colby will be a toddler. It reminds me of one of those sappy movies that makes you cry when you see the montage of time passing. Ahhh, life. :o)

Okay, I think I'm going to do some Yoga while Colby's napping today. I feel so chunky lately, and I'm not 100% sure why. Maybe because Colby's not really breastfeeding anymore and I'm not burning those extra calories? Hmmmm...

Oh, wait! One more thing. Colby slept through the night last night! I am convinced that it is directly related to the fact that he's mostly on formula now. I think breastmilk is too easily digested and therefore makes him hungry faster. Ever since he started on formula, he's been sleeping longer and longer. I woke up at 5 this morning almost in a panic, "What's wrong? Is he alive? Should I go check on him?" I didn't check on him because I didn't want to wake him up, but I didn't really get back to sleep. Hopefully he continues this sleeping through the night trend. I could get used to it!

To Do:

1. Yoga

2. Walk

3. Pick up invites

4. Laundry

5. Dishes

6. Vaccuum

Day 39: Ahhh, I love nap time.

Tuesday, August 29th

I think I'm going to be totally lost when Colby decides to go down to one nap a day. I love the break in the morning (when I drink my coffee, mess around on the internet, take a shower) and in the afternoon (when I clean and start dinner). I don't know what I'm going to do when I have to do all of those things in one naptime. I think I'll have to sacrifice the shower. I kid, I kid!

Clint and I are trying SO hard to save money. We just set up a budget for ourselves and figured that we're spending way too much money on groceries and going out. So far, we're staying within the budget, but there are still 2 more weeks left of this "month" (we're going from the 15th of one month to the 14th of the next). It's so exciting to save money, but it sucks when you're trying to get started. I know it will all pay off once we see our savings growing, though.

I'm really excited because we just settled on my car accident from 2004. We got enough money to pay off my car! We're going to continue taking the amount of that car payment out each month, but put it into a CD or other high-interest savings. That's going to add up really fast, and we won't miss the money because we aren't used to having it in the first place! We're going to use that money as our "home improvement fund." We know we're going to have to buy a fixer-upper when we do eventually buy a house, so we want to have some cash on hand for new paint, carpet, water heater, whatever we'll need to fix it up! Now if we could only buy a house...

Man, we are so lucky to have such generous parents. They are always babysitting Colby, taking us to dinner, buying us stuff, helping us pay for other things. My parents are going to supply BBQ stuff for Colby's birthday. Clint's parents just gave us their 32" (or is it 35"...) TV with the stand. Not only that, they helped us move it up here. I feel so spoiled! I wish we could pay them back. I can't wait until we're making more money and we can treat them to dinner every once and a while. I know, they're parents and they don't expect it of us. I know they want to help us out because that's what parents do. I just hope they know how much we appreciate it. We are so lucky.

I'm not quite sure what's on today's agenda. I know I need to go for a walk, but I feel like I need to switch it up. Maybe I'll drive to another trail or something. This neighborhood is nice, but it gets boring walking the same way every day. Blech.

Calories Burned This Week: 265

To Do:

1. Walk

2. Mop Floors

3. Dishes

4. Laundry

Day 38: I dedicate this to Aunt Donna.

Monday, August 28th

See Aunt Donna, I told you I'd do it. You didn't believe me did you?

After attending a family get-together this weekend, I realized how many people actually read my rambling blogs and actually enjoy them, so I decided to get to writing them again! This is for all of my fans out there.

; )

Alrighty then, down to business. I was doing so bad at exercising and eating well, but I think I'm back on track. (Okay, with the exception of the crap I ate last weekend.) Clint and I have realized how much we spend on groceries and eating out, and decided to re-evaluate our spending. I have started planning meals for the week and shopping only on Sunday or Monday. That way, I don't find myself in the grocery store multiple times a week, spending money on stuff that we really don't need. Plus, I'm planning lots of healthy meals, so that's a double bonus! My cousin Leslie suggested the site allrecipes.com and I LOVE it. They have a kagillion recipes complete with nutrition facts and suggestions for side dishes to serve with the meal. It has been wonderful. I'm trying to fix us a couple of vegetarian meals every week too, because meat is so dog-gone expensive! So far so good!

Clint took one section of the CPA exam on Friday. We're crossing our fingers that he passed. He worked his butt of for this one, I'm positive that he aced it. He was so ready for that test. I'm so proud of my man! He's going to take this week off from studying, but has to get right back on it after the weekend. He has another test on October 7th!

Clint's mom took me shopping for a new outfit on Friday! My birthday isn't until 9/11, but there's nothing better than an early birthday present! I am so spoiled by my mother-in-law. I got two totally cute shirts and a pair of dark blue jeans that I don't have to have hemmed. Wait, I'm going to repeat that, because I don't think you were paying attention: I don't have to get them hemmed. Do you know what that means to a short person like me?! Oh, and to make it even better, they're hella cute. Now I just need to get myself a pair of sexy heels and my outfit will be complete.

Other than that, nothing else is new! Colby is a walking machine now, which is so cute and yet so scary. He's a clutz like his mama, so he gets a new bump, scratch, or bruise every day. Poor kid.

So much to do today. After Colby gets up from his nap and has some lunch, we're going to walk to Costco. I sent the invitation that my mom made in and got one copy made so I can make sure it turns out okay before I jump into ordering all of them. I still can't believe my baby is turning one...

To Do:

1. Walk

2. Pick up Invitation

3. Laundry

4. Dishes

5. Plan Meals for Week

6. Grocery Shopping

Day 37: What an awesome weekend!

Monday, August 14th

I did so bad at blogging last week! It was a pretty busy week, though, so you can't blame me. I still did my exercises for the most part, so that's good! I have come to the realization that I get checked out a lot when I rollerblade. I don't know if it's because not many people rollerblade anymore and I look like a total nerd because I still am, or if it's because I'm just too damn good looking to keep your eyes off me. I think I'll go with option two. Last week I was on the last stretch of road towards our place and these guys passed me. They turned around and slowed down. I started getting pretty worried at this point. Then, the driver opened his door and asked me how to get to the freeway. I gave them really quick directions, but didn't stop rollerblading. I was so afraid that they were going to try to grab me. But, thankfully, the driver closed the door and they drove off, but not before telling me, "Oh by the way, you look really good." Maybe I am just too damn good looking... ; )

This weekend was a great one. Friday night I went on a "date" with my friend Kendra. We had Mexican, went to Coldstone, and watched Step Up. It was such a fun time! I love being able to get away and have some ever-important girl talk. It's great!

Saturday my aunt and uncle had their 30th anniversary party. That was so much fun. They had awesome food, a really sweet slideshow, and we all got to learn how to Cha-Cha. Clint and I had tons of fun, and I think we got the dance down pretty well. I want to take more dance lessons with Clint since we have so much fun doing it. We loved taking Swing Dancing lessons, and we would have fun learning more.

Today is going to be a lot of errand running. I ended up selling 2 items on ebay, which is great, but I netted a total of $2 in profit. Don't worry, I won't spend it all in one place. So today I have to go to the post office to send the packages, among other not-fun errands. Wohoo!

This is probably going to be another bad week for blogging. I'm going down tomorrow to hang out and staying until Wednesday, when I'm meeting up with a few other mommies.

Have a great week!

To do:

1. Errands!

2. Fold laundry

3. Walk

4. Jog/Rollerblade

Day 36: Another new week!

Monday, August 7th

What a great weekend. We didn't do anything special, but just hanging out and not having to go anywhere was awesome. My mom came up as planned and she treated us to lunch at the Olive Garden. Then, after Colby went down for the night, she and I went to Applebee's and had drinks and dessert. It was fun to just hang out and laugh and not have to worry about where Colby is or what he's putting in his mouth.

Sunday we went to church. It's funny: when I was younger, I thought sitting through a church service was so boring. Now that I'm older and especially now that I have a child, it's actually a great break for me and somewhat relaxing. It's awesome too because Colby absolutely loves the nursery. Three different people complemented us on how well-behaved Colby is. They said he sat in the corner and just watched kids, laughed, and clapped his hands most of the time. So cute.

So this is another new week! I burned lots of calories last week and I hope to do just as well, if not better, this week. In addition, I think I'm going to join the message boards on Sparkpeople. It just helps to talk to people who are trying to loose weight. It's nice to hear their tips and tricks and just be able to comiserate with how tough it is to loose those last 15 pounds. My goal is to be 135 or less by September 25th, which is Colby's one year appointment. That's a little less than 2 months away, so I think I can do it.

Alrighty, hope everyone has a great week!

Total Calories Burned Last Week: 835!

To Do:

1. Walk

2. Jog/Rollerblade

3. Laundry

4. Dishes

5. Clean Bathroom

Day 35: Today I brag about Colby.

Friday, August 4th

Yesterday was great! Colby and I went for a walk to the coffee stand and back, and burned lots of calories. Okay, so I got a snickerdoodle at the coffee stand which was slightly counter-productive. Whatever. : ) I didn't do the strength training, although I think I will after I finish drinking my cup of coffee and typing this.

Today is already a great day. Colby is being so funny. He is starting to understand more and more of what I say and now he points at things, looks at me, and says "Dah" and waits until I tell him what it is. Then he'll point at it again and say, "Woahw." Everything is "Woahw" to him. It's cute because it sounds like whoa, but he ends it with a "w" like he's mixing it with the word "Wow." I don't know if that makes sense, but it would if you heard him.

Colby is also getting a lot more daring. He is standing up for long periods of time, totally unassisted. He took another step today, but fell because I said, "Oh my gosh!" really loud. Damn my enthusiasm.

I can't believe my little boy is growing up! He already has such a funny personality. He is changing every day, and that totally trips me out. And he looks different too. Every day I go to pick him up I feel like his face is slimmer or his hair is longer. Trippy. It's so exciting to watch him grow, but so sad too! I'm glad that we're going to wait a couple of years for number 2 though, because this is the only time I'm going to be able to focus all of my attention on one child. I think Colby's going to be a great big-brother, though. I can already tell. He loves other kids and babies!

I'm excited for this afternoon. I begged my mom to come up and hang out with me while Clint's studying for the CPA exam. I say I begged, but it didn't take much convincing. My parents hardly ever turn down an excuse to come see Colby. So, I think we're going to go to lunch and walk around the mall. I'm just glad to have some company. It gets lonely when Clint's studying. But it will all pay off when he passes! Oh man, when that happens we are going to PAR-TAY!

Oh! I posted some items on eBay last night. I'm nervous that they aren't going to sell though. I know, they haven't even been up for 24 hours yet and most of the bidding doesn't start until the end of the auction, so I shouldn't worry. Eh, we'll see!

Alrighty, I should probably be off to straighten up and hopefully do those exercises. I know I'm probably not going to do much in the way of exercising tonight, so I should do something today! Have an awesome weekend!

Calories Burned Yesterday:

• Walk 17 min/mile- 240 Cal.

Total Calories Burned This Week: 835

(My Sparkpeople goal for calories burned is 560. I have already blown that out of the water!

Go Lindsay, it's your birthday...)

To Do:

1. Dishes

2. Laundry

3. Straighten Up

Day 34: Sleep is glorious.

Thursday, August 3rd

Colby slept the whole night last night! I'm talkin' he went down at 8pm and woke up at 6:30am. He must've had a bad dream or his teeth were bugging him because at 9pm he woke up crying, but all it took was a little rocking and he was back down in minutes. After eating at 6:30am, he went back down until 9am! Do you understand what this means? I got sleep! Wonderful, glorious, uninterrupted sleep!

As a result, I am a new woman today. Refreshed and ready to face the day. No more whining. And what's better is that Colby is in a good mood too! (By the way, he refused to take his afternoon nap which resulted in many melt downs over minor things. And Colby was pretty upset too. Ha! I'm so funny!)

Today Clint didn't take the iPod, so we're definitely going for a walk. I think we'll go somewhere other than our neighborhood, though. I need a change of scenery. I'm looking forward to it!

I just made some money cooking for my parents and I'm going to buy Clint an iPod. He deserves it. He works so hard day in and day out. He gets up before 6am on most days and goes to work. He comes home by 5, spends time with Colby and eats dinner. By 6 he's studying dilligently for the CPA exam. By 9 he's working on his and Jesse's internet company that they're trying to get up and running. And yet, he still has time for us. He deserves to have his own iPod that he can go running with and bring to work. Now to decide what to engrave on the back...

Anyway, Colby's down for his first nap, so I'd better go take a shower. Have a good day!

Calories Burned Yesterday:

• Rollerblade 15 mins- 126 Cal.

Total Calories Burned This Week: 595

To Do:

1. Dishes

2. Walk

3. Strength Training Exercises

Day 33: Teeth and whining.

Wednesday, August 2nd

I said it once, and I'll say it again: teething sucks. Poor Colby looks like he's getting 4 teeth on top at the same time. Ouch. This means he's not sleeping very well at night, which means I'm not sleeping well. Double ouch. I am completely wiped out, even though I took a nap again this morning.

Today I went to the dentist. I haven't been to the dentist since 2004 because the dentist we had was a total a-hole and I didn't want to go back. Then Clint got his new job and we've had dental coverage, but I just haven't gotten around to making an appointment. (Woops, my bad.) My teeth weren't horrible, but it was clear that I hadn't been in for a while. I have 3 whopping cavities. They scheduled me to get them filled and tried to get me to have the white ones put in. They're waaay back in my mouth and by getting silver fillings I saved $155. Even so, it'll cost us $100 for the fillings and I don't even want to know how much this checkup, x-rays, and cleaning cost.

Excuse me while I rage for a bit... Ugh! Why is everything so damn expensive?! We just finished paying off medical bills from Colby's birth, and then we get this random $165 bill from some appointment I had in March of 2005. What is that?! So we paid that off last month and I'm thinking we're in the clear from random bills for a while, so we can save some extra moola, but then we go to the dentist and that's going to cost us a fortune. Clint has an appointment for next Friday and he thinks he'll probably have at least a few cavities, since I did. So there's more money for another checkup and likely more fillings. AHHHHH! Are we ever going to come out on top?! Are we ever going to be able to save money to get out of this damn apartment and into a house? Are we ever going to be able to afford to have another kid? At this point in time it looks bleak. Damnit.

So this leads to me feeling guilty about not working. Yet again. I hate feeling guilty about that. Yeah, I could go back to work. I could go back to evening shifts at some lame waitressing job, but that means I don't get to spend time with Clint. I could go and find a day job and put Colby in daycare, but first of all I don't want to, and second of all, it's expensive. I've researched the cost and I'd basically be working to pay daycare expenses. What's the point in that?

I'm tired today, can you tell? I'm tired and cranky and extremely pessimistic. I think I need chocolate. Chocolate almost always makes me feel better, even if it's just for a little bit. : ) But wait, chocolate would not only go against me trying to lose weight, but it could give me more cavities. Grand!

To top things off, Clint took my iPod to work today, so I haven't gone for a walk. I know, lame excuse, but I really don't enjoy walking without a soundtrack. I guess I'm a little ADD in that way.

Alright, I think I need another nap. That is, if I can get Colby to take one too. Oy. I don't know if anyone reads these blogs anymore, but if you do, I could really use some encouragement today.

Calories Burned Yesterday:

• Walk 17 min/mile for 26 mins- 124.8 Cal.

Total Calories Burned This Week: 469 Cal.

To Do:

1. Dishes

2. Jog/Rollerblade

Day 32: Rambling woman.

Tuesday, August 1st

I'm a little behind today. It has taken me longer than I anticipated to recover from the weekend, and I had to nap when Colby took his morning nap. It was good, though. I feel like I'm ready and rarin' to go now.

I don't know if I have mentioned it before, but there's this awesome site called Sparkpeople.com that I use on a regular basis. I was using it for a while to track everything I eat, but that got really old really fast. I also used it to get those quotes that until recently have been on each of my blogs. I'm sure I'll bring that back, but right now I'm too lazy. Anyway, there are a couple of features on there that I still use and love. One of them is the exercise tracker. You put in the exercise you did, and how long you did it for and it calculates how many calories you burned based on the height and weight info that you put into the system. It's awesome! Another cool thing is that it tracks your progress of weight loss as well as inches off your hips, waist, and neck. It's such a good site and the best part is that it's totally FREE! I love it.

I think I'm going to start tracking on here the calories I have burned the day before, and keep a running tally. That might help me out even more.

Can you believe it's already August?! Holy crap! Colby is going to be a year old next month! That absolutely blows my mind. I'm excited to watch him grow. He is already changing so much! If you haven't already, you should check out the videos of him on our family page. He's too cute for words.

I'm kind of excited about my own birthday this year. It isn't anything special, I'm just turning 24, and I don't plan on doing anything big, but I'm psyched. Here's why: When I turned 21, I got married 2 days later and therefore wasn't able to party it up. When I turned 22 I was pretty much broke. When I turned 23 I was pregnant. Now, I'm turning 24 and I'm not pregnant or getting married and although we're not rollin' in the dough, I think we could afford a night out on the town. That would be so much fun. Anyone wanna go party it up with me?

Speaking of money and rollin' in the dough... I am really motivated to save money. I mean, I usually am, but we haven't done the best job of it. Don't get me wrong, we're not dumb with our money and have a savings as well as a retirement account for Clint, but we both think we could do better about our spending. I'm going to try and find some good tips online for saving cash, I bet there are at least a few things we could be doing that we don't even think about. The more money we have saved away for a down payment on a house, or furniture, or whatever, the easier it will be to take that leap and actually buy a house. God, I want a house so bad. But I digress...

Yesterday I forgot that it was my night to go out and run or rollerblade, so I rollerbladed instead of crunches. Since tonight is Clint's run night I'll do them then! I took Colby in the stroller and rollerbladed for a couple of miles. Man, I thought it was a good workout rollerblading without the stroller, it is tough with it! Shew!

Alrighty, I have more I could ramble about, but I think I should shut up and start cleaning now.

Calories Burned Yesterday:

• Rollerblade 26 mins- 218.4 Cal.
• Walk 19 min/mile 30 mins- 126 Cal.

To Do:

1. Dishes

2. Laundry

3. Walk

4. Six Strength Training

Exercises

from Sparkpeople